The Trap of an Amazon Wish List

Like almost everyone in the world, I have an Amazon wish list.

Yeah, I know..."his birthday's next week, so he's drawing attention to the wish list." That, my friends, is really not the case.  I was just looking over my wish list, and thinking about the way I use it, and how vaguely insidious it is.

Most of the time, I use it to remind myself about things to buy for myself. I see a game, or a movie, or whatever, that's coming out in a few months, and I slap it in there, so I can always find it. Yeah, occasionally, I'll pre-order things a week or two before, but never 9 or 12 months in advance...Well, Ok, some things.

Yet, I also have a bad habit of just shoving things in there. Yeah, it's all stuff I'd like to have, but any time the list gets over 2 pages, I start to feel antsy. Yes, antsy...the reality that I'll never actually buy all this stuff starts to get to me. Which, I suppose, is better than actually buying it, and living in poverty. Yet, then there's the stuff that I can't bear to take off, because I know I want it...eventually, yet I never get around to buying...

Freaks and Geeks, anyone?

God, being a mass media/pop culture whore is difficult.

Still the good, let's be honest, outweighs the bad.  I mean, before Amazon I'd have had to WRITE DOWN LISTS...and REMEMBER WHERE THEY WERE. Surely, this alone is proof of the advance of our civilization. Let alone...how would I know that there's a Lemmy autobiography available without Amazon and it's wonderful suggestions?

Seriously, the thing is a millstone at times. Add things, then, crap, I'm over two pages. Yet, I keep dropping crap in there. Maybe someday I'll be independently wealthy, and it'll be a useless thing...I'll just buy what I want, right then and there.

Woah! I need this!

And lo, the Monday after the feast.

Well, here we sit on Monday November 30th....

The trip to Omaha was pretty uneventful. I got to see Ken, and take in his show Christmas in New England. We spent time with the Byrd family, and all was pretty well.

I still have yet to see my order from Amazon, but apparently a replacement is on the way. That's at least settled, though I am still not happy with the amount of time I could've been enjoying the movie and CD that is now past...I know it's all very silly, I really do, but these two items were things I was really looking forward to immersing myself in, and the wait has been really difficult.

So, for all of you out there who've been thinking it...You're right, I am ridiculous, but I have ever right in the world to be ridiculous, thank you very much.

The lack of success in my auditions is still weighing on me. Totally hypocritical, based on the philosophies I have espoused on this blog, but God damn...This last one hit me hard. I'm not quite sure how to process it, yet. Sure, I know, rationally, that there will be other opportunities, and I knew that this was an audition for a tight-knit ensemble. So, the ultimate resolution should not be such a downer, or a surprise.

But it is.

But we soldier on, right?

Dreary week...

So, my weekend was hardly "relaxing." It was packed full of commitments and tasks to be checked off.

Saturday from 9-2, I had a callback. It was a long day of auditioning. Compounded by the fact that I really wanted this show and this role. I've had a pretty long "dry-spell" audition-wise, at least for me. (Side note - I am 100% aware that I have been VERY lucky here in Chicago, and really have no room to complain about a 6-9 month period wherein I was not getting cast.) So, I went into this callback very much wanting to perform well.

Not the best way to approach an audition, as I've said in other blogs.

I still very much feel that you have to be able to let each audition go, pretty much immediately after you walk out, and accept a "what will be, will be," attitude. It's the only way to keep sane and stop torturing yourself over "failures" in the audition room. That being said, we're all human, and there's always "those shows," that you feel more than others. Shows that you, flat out, just want to have a shot at.

Well, this show on Saturday...it was one of those shows for me.

I still am in the dark. Waiting. I've worked with this director before, and he's always been quite good about letting me know, "sorry, next time," if need be. Still, it's hard. I'm almost to the point where I can say, "if it was yes, I'd have heard."

But not yet. I'm still holding some hope.

After the audition, we had a lovely meal at Wishbone, and then off to the Auditorium Theatre for the John Fogerty show. Great show, high energy, and, by God, that man's voice is better preserved than any singer I can think of. He still sounds EXACTLY like the records. He also has the most amazing hair, ever...like, Ronald Regan black hair. The man has to be sixty-five, at least, I wonder if his preserved voice and hair are connected?

I do have to say, I'm certain I'm spoiled by Springsteen, but an "evening with" show that only runs 1:45 seems a little slight. On a certain level I understand it, because those CCR tunes, well, none of them is over 3 minutes long, but...I dunno. He played nothing off Blue Moon Swamp or Revival, which is a damn shame. You could easily mine another 3o minutes out of those two excellent albums. Other than that I was extremely happy with the setlist;

AUDITORIUM THEATRE
CHICAGO, IL - NOVEMBER 21, 2009

HEY TONIGHT
GREEN RIVER
SUSIE Q
WHEN WILL I BE LOVED
WHO’LL STOP THE RAIN
LOOKIN’ OUT MY BACKDOOR
LODI
RAMBLE TAMBLE
BACK HOME AGAIN
I PUT A SPELL ON YOU
BIG TRAIN FROM MEMPHIS
KEEP ON CHOOGLIN’
HAVE YOU EVR SEEN THE RAIN
GARDEN PARTY
BORN ON THE BAYOU
HAUNTED HOUSE
NIGHT TIME IS THE RIGHT TIME
COMIN’ DOWN THE ROAD
ROCK AND ROLL GIRLS
DOWN ON THE CORNER
CENTERFIELD
BAD MOON RISING
OLD MAN DOWN THE ROAD
FORTUNATE SON
GOOD GOLLY MISS MOLLY
PROUD MARY

Fogerty seemed in very good spirits and really seemed to be having a great time with the crowd. I did wish we could've been a little closer in, but don't you always? The band was fantastic, especially fiddle/guitar/bongo/mandolin player Jason Mowery. Just a fantastic time, I would totally see him again.

Sunday consisted of a whole day at Stage Left. Rehearsal for a reading in the AM, then back for rehearsal for our winter show Here Where It's Safe by M.E.H. Lewis, and directed by Scott Bishop. I've agreed to assistant direct the show, so I'm excited about that. Ought to be fun to have some hand in my company's only full production this year.

I also spent some time going over a script, and writing a short, quick directing proposal for it, for another company. That's in for their consideration, so we shall see. That would be, primarily, a summer project.

Shane is still on a burner, somewhere...waiting.

The week starts with me insanely frustrated with Amazon. My Them Crooked Vultures CD and Star Trek Blu-Ray have still not arrived.

Sloooooow Burrrrrn....

**sigh**